Barack and Roll

This blog is known for 3 important things. Vaguely homoerotic crotch-gazing, poop jokes, and incisive, cutting edge, world-class political commentary.

Last night, ESPN aired a segment where Stuart Scott (who borrowed Kurt Rambis’ goggles for the occasion), played a little one on one b-ball and talked shop with the Democratic Presidential Nominee, Barack Obama.



From this interview we learned many important things about Senator Obama:

* As a lefty, he has the ability to drive and score with both hands. We all know what that means.

* Loves the Sweetness. And damned if that doesn’t hit home for this Chicago boy. Walter Payton was near the perfect Chicago citizen. I ride the train past Walter Payton Prep everyday. His other charitable deeds live on throughout the city. Walter was a great role model as a player and as a citizen. I’m honored that Barack recognizes this.

* Barack believes the Olympics should not be overly politicized (yes!). Yet states that Human Rights Abuses cannot be overlooked (double yes!).

* Barack also states that Selig should suck it up and deal with steroids himself. Instead of letting congress waste their time and taxpayer money cleaning up the mess Selig’s blissful ignorance left behind (quadruple yes!!).

* And finally, when asked about a Cubs vs Sox World Series, Barack has this to say:

"Who would you root for?'' Scott asked.
"Oh, that's easy,'' Obama replied. "White Sox. I'm not one of these fair weather fans, you go to Wrigley Field, you have a beer, beautiful people up there. People aren't watching the game. It's not serious. White Sox, that's baseball. Southside."

Southside. I can’t even imagine what I could possibly add to that. Speechless doesn’t do it. My words have left me. khohpuprebv;advskrbjah

After doing a touch of research for this important political piece, I also came across another wonderful little nugget. Here’s a transcript of the speech Obama read on THE FLOOR OF THE SENATE after the White Sox won the World Series. 

I love this man.

The only question I have left, and it keeps me up at night, is… if both Barack and Carlos Quentin were running for president… who would I vote for?

-bb13

Hop on the Pain-Train to Title Town!

Ummm, welcome to the team Ken Griffey, Jr? Today the White Sox made a bold... if largely puzzling splash by trading a middling minor league second baseman (Danny Richar) and perhaps the worst reliever ever (Nick "Magic" Massett) for the once mighty and formidable Junior. 

Junior has been an annual subject of trade rumors for the Sox since Kenny "Dark Ninja" Williams took over as GM. And finally, Kenny's man-crush/love-boner for Junior has come to fruition. But at the most unexpected of times. Why unexpected? Cuz where the hell is Junior gonna play?

The Sox are locked in at the corner OF. Q! and Dye aren't going anywhere, and both continue to rake. There is currently an abysmal black hole in Paul "Eeyore" Konerko at first base. We have a better first baseman in Nick Swisher, currently playing center. And Jim "Pretty Rabbit" Thome as our slugging, left handed DH.

Where does Griffey fit into all of this. If the year was 1997, I would be crapping my pants in excitement. Griffey slides in CF, Swish moves to 1B, and Konerko helps set-up and take down the post-game spread. But as everyone knows, Junior ain't "Junior!" any more. He definitely can't play CF effectively, or without getting hurt. So wtf?

I don't really doubt Kenny Williams. The man brought the first World Series title to Chicago in almost a century. And everyone shat all over him this offseason, when all he did was bring in the best bullpen in the AL (of all time according to Joe Morgan), sign the Cuban Missile Alexei Ramirez for chump change, and there is that other guy... what's his name... oh, QQQQQ!!!!!. All for a pittance. And now Kenny wants, Junior. Kenny can have Junior, and the best lefty pinch hitter in baseball coming off the bench. Or whatever. 

My prediction is that there is another trade coming. We need to make some space if Junior is going to have any value. We'll see how the afternoon pans out.

But that's that. Junior is on the White Sox. I for one am psyched to see him in his alternate blacks. And I'll be standing and cheering like a mofo when he passes that greaseball, roided pockmark on the history of baseball, Sammy Sosa, on the all-time HR list. That will be a sight to behold.

So welcome to Title Train U.S. Junior. Get us a couple clutch hits this year, and we'll reward you with some nice hardware for the mantle back at home. Just stay away from the nerve tonic, and everything's gonna be all right.

-bb13

Cuban Missile Crisis

If you haven't already, everyone should certainly see this play:



That play is simply unbelievable and unlike any play I've ever seen. It's relatively common to see a fielder glove a ball then toss it to a teammate. But Alexei only uses his glove as a scoop and flicks it to Paulie as his momentum carries him away from first base... That's the kinda shit kids play around with on the sandlot. But Alexei pulls it off. And the icing on the cake is the incredulous barehanded grab by Paulie. He's like "wtf? really?". Then snatches it out of the air. Beautiful.

People dog on White Sox announcer Ken "The Hawk" Harrelson for being a homer, which he is. But I've never heard an announcer who had more emotionally invested in his team. His excitement during good plays... and his disappointment during bad plays, is tangible, palpable. One of the best parts of this clip is hearing Hawk go apoplectic, especially on the replay when he grasps the full magnitude of what he's seen.

It was truly an exciting day for the White Sox. Not only can we "hang a star" on that play. But my boy... the one and only, Carlos "Q!" Quentin. A major inspiration for the existence of this blog had this to add:


Let me set the scene. Two on, two out, bottom of the eighth. Sox down by two runs but have pulled within one run to make it it 7-8. The Rangers pull Eddie "I still play baseball!" Guardado, for their hippy-dippy douchebag closer CJ Wilson to face Q-uperman.

Now, there is some subtext here. Two weekends ago the Sox played the Rangers. In the top of the ninth (in Arlington), the Sox were down 8-12 going into the bottom of the 9th. CJ Wilson then gives up 3 runs to make it an 11-12 game. CJ escapes with a save, but jawing between Ozzie (big surprise) and CJ ensues. Apparently CJ gets a little too excited about getting the Sox players out. Ozzie takes offense. Q! happened to be one of those outs last time.

Fast forward to yesterday. Sox down and the Rangers bring in CJ Wilson to face Q!. And how does Q! respond?

In what is becoming classic Q! fashion. Carlos is building a legend in Chicago, that will be discussed in MUCH greater detail on this blog. But for now, I think the ringing echo of Hawk intoning "Mercy!" is enough to keep this Sox fan warm at night.

-bb13