Great Athletes of the Silver Screen: "Irish" Terry Conklin

Irish Terry Conklin: I'm not Irish.

Sol: It's boxing. It just means you're white.

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ATHLETE: "IRISH" TERRY CONKLIN

ACTOR: PETER BERG

MOVIE: THE GREAT WHITE HYPE

DOMINANT SPORT: FEIGNING HE'S A GOOD BOXER, HEAD BANGING, WORKING THE BAG, SPOUTING NONSENSE

LOVE INTEREST: LEGIONS OF GROUPIES, THE OVERHAND RIGHT

ENEMY: JAMES "THE GRIM REAPER" ROPER, HYPE, HOMELESSNESS

MISSION: "ERADICATE THE HOMELESSNESS SITUATIONS AND ALSO THE POVERTY SITUATIONS IN AMERICA, AS WELL AS THE UNITED STATES, FOREVER.", ROCK-N-ROLL

REAL-LIFE COUNTERPART: MICHAEL RAPAPORT

This 1996 film has been one of my favorites since I watched it in high school. It's not that it is a great film or because it was especially well done, but the movie is full of great one-liners and caricatures. In fact, after watching it again I wasn't even sure Conklin was the best character in the film. James Roper (Damon Wayans) and Hassan El Ruk'n (Jamie Foxx) both had their share of great quotes and memorable scenes but Berg's Conklin was brilliant.

The film starts with James "The Grim Reaper" Roper dismantling and eventually knocking out his 38th opponent. The only true challenger to Roper's throne, Marvin Shabazz (Michael Jace), spends the film being perpetually denied his rightful title shot by the scheming Reverend Sultan (Samuel L. Jackson). The source of Sultan's power lies in his inner circle, a mix of shrewd characters who each bring their own special talent. Sultan's only real allegiance is to power and money. He contests that people don't want to see a black heavyweight beat up another black heavyweight. Black plus white equals green.

When we first see "Irish" Terry Conklin, he's fronting a metal band called "Massive Head Wound." The back story is that he is the only man to ever beat Roper, he knocked Roper out as an amateur. His only real goals are to eradicate the "homelessness situations" in America and tend to his ever present flock of lady friends. In contrast, Shabazz is just "tired of watching him (Roper) drive around in 8 Rolls Royces" while he's driving around in a Merlot Brough-am. The number one contender certainly deserves at the very least a gold Brough-am, and a title shot. Alas, Sultan uses his connections to have Conklin ranked in the top ten in order to set the match up.

Roper quickly sets out to whip himself into the worst shape possible. He spends the majority of the film eating ice cream, chasing ice cream trucks, smoking, and watching soap operas. It would be easy to think that he's just a lazy champion, I would contest that he's much more complex. He wants to embarrass Conklin badly. By being as ill-prepared as he can be, he's giving himself a degree of difficulty and also showing people that he can beat Conklin with a 30 lb weight strapped to his stomach. He's also not interested in speaking about his philanthropic acts, a long way from Conklin's need to publicize every good deed he does. Roper succeeds in getting off a number of epic blasts on both Conklin, Shabazz, and even himself.

"Man, I could beat Conklin and my meat at the same time."
"Hey, we ain't duckin' you man. You're just so black we can't find you."
"Oh, I'm in shape. I'm round."

I won't give up the ending as I suppose at least one person may see this movie after reading this but I will give you 5 reasons to see the film:

1. Conklin's goofy monologues.
2. Any scene involving El Ruk'n.
3. Roper's endless one-liners.
4. The secondary characters including Conklin's racist trainer Johnny Windsor (John Rhys-Davies), Jeff Goldblum as a long-winded documentarian, and Jon Lovitz as a disgraced publicist.
5. Only in this film can a fighter with no previous bouts be ranked in the top 10. The movie does serve as a hyperbolous look at what professional boxing has become, a business masquerading as a sport. Anything is more believable than Wayans and Berg playing heavyweight fighters.
   

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Irish Terry Conklin: Cleveland's a real city with real people who aren't concerned with bourgeois attitudes, concerned with sexism, racism, religiousism or any of the other kind of "isms" that Vegas is about. Las Vegas is one of the most exploitive places I've ever seen in my life, particularly exploitive towards women. I've never been to a city more exploitive towards women. It makes me sick, and I can't wait to go home. [Snorts, Strums guitar]

Interviewer: But, wasn't that you on the cover of Playboy magazine?

Irish Terry Conklin: What's that? ---- Yeah that was me on the cover of Playboy magazine, but let me say two things. One, I hated it; and two, that's not what I'm about.

-PSon