Week 7 - Through the Eyes of a Fan

Thoughts while watching DirectTV's Sunday Ticket.

• The Red Zone Channel is a fantasy player's dream. No need to hold a remote. If you want to actually watch a game, this channel is not for you. For me, it feeds the addiction.
• Steve Smith reminds me of the rage zombies from 28 Days Later.
• Brodie Croyle is hurt. Nobody cares.
  
• There is no fantasy player worse than LenDale White. Chris Johnson does all the work getting the ball near the goal line and LenDale punches it in from one yard out. Infuriating when you're going against him. Doubled when you have Chris Johnson.
• In an obvious ode to former Dolphins great Bob Griese, Chad Pennington channels Griese's son Brian with a textbook TAINT (the Bill Simmons coined Touchdown After INT) after being hurried out of the pocket.
  
• There are signs of life in Buffalo! Apparently there was a power outage so we have been relegated to updates of an alleged game being played. Dan Dierdorf says some Mylar balloons got caught up in a transformer. You couldn't make that up.
• Chris Johnson ran a 4.24 in the Combine. Coincidentally, that's how many cheeseburgers LenDale White eats in one sitting on average.
• Shots of TO flipping out on the sideline. That's not his quarterback out there.
• On cue, Chris Johnson with the 26 yard run to set up LenDale White's lumbering 3 yard TD. Somebody get that guy some oxygen. Current stats: Chris Johnson 9 for 82 yards 0 TDs, LenDale White 8 for 34 yards 2 TDs. Nice.
  
• Scott Linehan placed his name on the short list of the NFL's poorest coaches. Most of the work has been done after he was fired. The Rams beat a very good Redskins team last week and are currently up big on the Cowboys. Previously they looked like the worst team in the league.
• Todd Heap looks like Rube from Major League 2.
• Thoughts while watching Willis McGahee run towards a parlay-breaking TD, "Please fumble... FUMBLE!" Under still alive... for now.
• Blocked punt touchdown for the 49ers. Can you say, over?!
• Marion Barber just got jacked up. That should have been a fumble but they called it incomplete. The karma gods concur as Brad Johnson promptly throws an INT. Reminds me of the time that Bradlee Van Pelt threw interceptions on 2 consecutive plays (the D fumbled the first).
• LenDale White for an 80 yard TD. There are no words.
• Chris Johnson answers with a 66 yards TD romp and celebrates by laying down a couple of drum beats afterwards. He's a renaissance man.
• Nothing says "unoriginal" like the D "fence" sign, the paper bag on your head, or any sign where people use the TV station's acronym with each letter representing contrived words to represent their team.
• That ominous cloud you see is the Wade Phillips era drawing to a close. Heads are gonna roll in Dallas.
• There's some guy named T. Choice running the ball in Dallas. Abandon ship Dallas fans, The Choice is yours. Boom!
• Just as I write that, the Cowboys score. They follow that up with a half-hearted celebration. How bout them Cowboys? TO is seen on the sidelines drafting his Brad Johnson blasts for the press conference.
• Jared Allen makes a great play on a Rashied Davis end-around to give the Vikings a chance to tie the game.
• Unbelievable, Gus Frerotte throws an INT to seal it for Chicago. The Bears D scored an ungodly amount of fantasy points for a team that gave up 41 points.

That will end the first round of games. Perhaps I'll be back later.

-PSon